It was a hot September Tuesday in 2010 when my little Snake joined the party that is our tiny fam.
He is my every joy and happiness.
He makes me laugh every single day.
He has made Phil and I the happiest people in the world.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY JAKE-THE-SNAKE
In honor of his arrival in this world one year ago,
click read more (below my signature) to read his birth story written a week after his birth.
Disclaimer: it is as long as the labor that took to get him here.

September 27, 2010. Jacob Matthew Arrives in the World.
After months of taking home pregnancy tests every first week
of every month of our married life (“just in case”), on the New Year I said I would
give up on taking tests and had decided to let Mother Nature do what it does.
But on January 5th I was overcome with temptation and went to the
store to purchase, yet again, pregnancy tests. My justification for succumbing
into temptation was buying the cheapest tests there were.
I came home and, sure that it would come out negative, took
it while Phil was at work. To my shock, only a few seconds later, there were
two lines coming up. I distinctively remember my mouth dropping.
I called Phil to come home immediately and, not knowing what
to say, I told him I needed him to come home “just because” but he wouldn’t
give in so easily. He had a meeting after work and was not planning on stopping
at home in between. Finally I said “I took a test.”
“Was it positive?” he asked.
I was tempted to say: “No, bud. Just wanted you to come home
to look at the 15th negative pregnancy test I have taken in 9
months.” But I didn’t.
“Yes,” I said. He rushed home and I cried and we talked
about our baby’s arrival. It would take a while to let it all sink in though.
Fast forward 40 weeks to my estimated due date: September 10, 2010. The emphasis is on the word
“estimated.” Nothing was happening. Our baby had his own plans. He would call
my womb his home for 11 more excruciatingly painful and patience testing days.
A check up with my doctor on the previous week to my due
date showed that I hadn’t even started dilating or effacing. It was so
discouraging. I had run a fever, though, for a few days and we were hoping the
flu like symptoms would be the beginning of it all. Fearing an infection, Dr.
Hoffman had me go into the hospital to try to find a reason for my fever. I was
dehydrated but otherwise fine.
It was the first time I had the chance to be induced but,
because of our plans to have a drug free childbirth, I had to turn the offer
down.
At a September 16 appointment, I was offered to strip my
membranes but I hadn’t dilated so it was an empty promise. I was offered to be
induced via medications to encourage dilating, but the baby was still at -3
station so, again I had to turn the offer down.
After several tests and ultrasounds in the days after my due
date, on Thursday September 16 I began to have irregular contractions.
Finally I felt that something
was in the works.
Two more days passed and I had to go into the hospital for a
non-stress test as the baby was over a week overdue. An internal exam showed
that I still hadn’t dilated. I was so discouraged, but I turned down yet
another offer for induction.
On Sunday the contractions started getting real. Decreasing
from every ten minutes to every 4 or so by 6am on Monday. I thought I couldn’t
take it anymore so we packed the car and went to the hospital, only to find out
I had dilated only 2cm. Again, a discouraging prognosis.
After another offer for induction, we checked out and went
home to labor some more. I returned to Dr. Hoffman’s office later in the day
where he said I had effaced some more and he predicted the baby would be here
within 24 hours.
The thought of another night in grueling pain was almost
unbearable but, on second thought, the thought of only one more night of grueling pain didn’t seem so bad after
having gone through a whole weekend of pain. So we went on home, stopped at the
supermarket. Phil grabbed dinner supplies to make penne vodka for himself and
caprese salad for me. We got home and I caught the last “long” stretch of sleep
I could get. I believe I slept for about an hour in 8 or so minute intervals.
The night went on and I watched TV, Phil rubbed my back, I
took 2 baths and 3 showers to relieve the pain during contractions. Phil drew
the baths for me, put candles and music on for me to relax. He was able to
sleep for about 2 hours that night and then woke back up to help me through contractions.
I kept going into the baby’s room and grabbing onto the changing table while
the contractions were happening. I prayed one Hail Mary per contraction at
first and then realized they were getting longer when I had to pray two Hail
Mary’s at a time. Sometimes an Our Father, too, depending on how fast I was
praying.
At around 4:30am I was starving and couldn’t handle the pain
any longer. I asked Phil to make me oatmeal and in the time he went downstairs
and came back up to our bedroom he said he noticed a change. He knew I couldn’t
take it any more. I had reached “that point.”
Dr. Hoffman had asked us to wait until the contractions were
2 minutes apart for 30 minutes before going to the hospital. Our birthing class
had told us to wait until I was having contractions at 3 minutes apart for 2
hours that were 1 minute long before going to the hospital. I never made it to either
point. Phil called Dr. Hoffman and he said he was on his way to the hospital
and to meet him there.
We took our time. It was close to 7am when the shifts change
at the hospital and I did not want to piss off a nurse on her way out. We got
to the hospital right before 7am.
It must have been the full moon because I was the 17th
admission of the night. I didn’t even have a room to go into and was put into a
room with three or four other beds where I could hear other women talking
calmly to nurses about their scheduled c-sections and patiently asking for
epidurals.
I was jealous of their choice of procedure.
Phil at this point had been directing my breathing by making
eye contact and breathing along with him. That got me through many
contractions. In the room with all the beds, I was checked and found out I was
about 6cm dilated according to the nurse and then had gone to 7-8cm within a
half an hour when we saw Dr. Hoffman.
At the time I didn’t think that was sufficient but everyone
seemed to be pleased. In my head I wanted to be 10cm dilated and to get the
baby out. My water was still intact and Dr. Hoffman said he’d come back to
break it as soon as I got into a room.
I sat on the birthing ball in hopes to relieve some pain and
I felt my water break. Things were happening on their own. Waiting was paying
off! The amniotic fluid showed a bit of meconium which I was told was normal for
a post term baby so I didn’t worry.
We got into a room by 9am when I continued to have regular
contractions. I was in so much pain during and in between contractions. I later
found out a lot of the pain was due to the fact that my baby had been facing
the wrong way and they hadn’t turned around to make the birth a bit easier for
me.
Within an hour I felt the urge to push. I was bearing down
and couldn’t breathe through the contractions despite Phil’s attempts to help
me through them.
Our wonderful nurse Paulette, a former doula, was so
supportive of letting me do what I wanted. She encouraged positions and rubbed
my back when Phil wasn’t around. She was such a blessing.
Dr. Hoffman came in and said I could lay down and push. Best
news all day! I was so happy.
So there I was, pushing like hell. Phil said he could see
the head. Every one was encouraging me in my pushing, but for some reason I
couldn’t believe it. It hadn’t sunk in that I could actually give birth to this
child and I was doing it.
Dr. Hoffman said I could feel the head and helped me to
touch it. I was amazed. He also told me the baby’s heart rate was going down
and he needed to come out within a few minutes. Meconium was getting thicker. I
needed to know that to try even harder.
He still wouldn’t move past a certain point. So close I
could feel his head, but still not enough. Dr. Hoffman had to use forceps to
guide him over the point he was stuck in. He helped him turn and within two or
three pushes I started feeling this immense amount of pressure. It didn’t hurt
or burn, it was just tight. Finally, the baby’s head was out and the rest of
his body slipped out so easily.
I couldn’t believe it. I will never forget the sight of that
long baby right in front of me. I couldn’t see the private parts and no one
said if it was a boy or a girl so I had to ask. Phil said he forgot to tell me
because he was just happy the baby was here and I wasn’t in pain any more. He
finally told me: it’s a boy!!
Jacob Matthew was born at 11:03am, 11 days fashionably late
but exactly on the day he was meant to be born. He weighed 7lbs. 9oz. and
measured 20 inches.
He was checked by a team of pediatricians who said he was
fine despite all of the “complications.” They placed him on me and I still couldn’t
believe it. It has been a week and I still really can’t believe it. I keep
waiting for someone to pick him up.
I love him more than anything. I daydream about what and who
he will be. I think about him as a little boy, then as a teenager, and then I
think about him as a man. Perhaps having his own children at a young age like
we did. I am so overwhelmed with joy that he is here and I can look at his
little face every minute of the day and not grow tired. He is perfect. His
little lips make funny shapes and I love when he yawns. He’s just perfect. I
can’t imagine life without him.
3 comments:
Your story is so beautiful! You brought me to tears. God bless you, Phil, and Jacob on his birthday!
Love Michelle
Esther, you are such a wonderful story teller. Happy Birthday Jacob and you did a great job picking your birthday- even if you had to make mommy wait longer for you to come. We love you!
Beautiful story! Happy birthday Jake!
And can I just apologize? I flaked on our email convo! I thought his party was THIS coming Saturday. I'm so sorry. :( How did the party go??
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